Girls and cars?...a match made in HELL!

almareallymatters

Active Member
GM_Car_Trouble.jpg


My car developed a strange "rattle" this week which seemed to be coming from the back. It mostly occured when I turned a sharp bend or went round a roundabout.

I'm not TOTALLY useless so I took a look underneath but couldn't see anything obvious. I sort of shook the exhaust pipe...kicked the tyres...banged about a bit...nothing! Then I figured there's no point having a brother-in-law who works as a car machanic and not employing the old damsel in distress routine... so I called him.

He dutifully appeared clutching his trusty little tool box and took the car out for a spin. Much to my relief he too heard the rattle and set about investigating it!

I went in to make a start on dinner whilst he tinkered about with it. A few minutes later he appeared saying he had fixed my "little problem."

The rattle was caused by something lose in the compartment where the spare tyre goes in the boot. He was clutching the offending article in his hand. What was it?...a bloody Cadbury's Cream Egg that's what! :o

Anyone else similarly machanically challenge?

Love Alma xxx
 
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A few months ago I had the RAC out two days running (my car and the OH's car the next day) and then again homestart a week later.:o)It was the same chap as well!! He's always at my local pub and takes the piss out of me.:o...he reckons i'm a "non starter":lbf:
 
A few months ago I had the RAC out two days running (my car and the OH's car the next day) and then again homestart a week later.:o)It was the same chap as well!! He's always at my local pub and takes the piss out of me.:o...he reckons i'm a "non starter":lbf:

It's not just ME then! :thumb:

What was it?...a Flake lodged in the patrol cap!!! :rolleyes:

Love Alma xxx
 
It's not just ME then! :thumb:

What was it?...a Flake lodged in the patrol cap!!! :rolleyes:

Love Alma xxx

Starter motor one time.Did you know you stick it in first then rock the car and it starts when the starter motor packs up?
 
Starter motor one time.Did you know you stick it in first then rock the car and it starts when the starter motor packs up?

I don't even know what a starter motor is darling! But thanks! :thumb:

I'm a bit worried now about "the boy who cried wolf"...next time I have car trouble he'll probably tell be to search for hidden confectionary before he comes round to help me out! :o

Love Alma xxx
 
Mrs Skinny pulled into the driveway last year and said that there was a repeating thudding sound from her car. I looked out of the window, then said to her "You do realise you've got a flat tyre, don't you?" "Err, no."

Anyway...



Peter
 
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meh never had a problem - watched someone elses head gasket blow once becuase she didnt put water in her car. what a nutter.
 
Mrs Skinny pulled into the driveway last year and said that there was a repeating thudding sound from her car. I looked out of the window, then said to her "You do realise you've got a flat tyre, don't you?" "Err, no."

Anyway...



Peter


I tried to reverse out of a parking space in Sainsburys the other day but the thing wouldn't budge...I put my foot to the floor...nothing! I asked a passing guy to look underneath to see if something was stuck under the car. He looked. There wasn't. I still had the handbrake on! :o

Love Alma xxx
 
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Both my breasts put TOGETHER are smaller than those beauties...by a country mile...as well you know JJ! :rolleyes:

Love Alma xxx

:eek:What are you implying? I have NEVER seen your breasts (and not because they are small):laughing:

I was going to post that Prefab Sprout song too:guitar:

Jukebox Jury
 
I was sent on a towing a trailor course at work two weeks ago......
spent two days driving around with the trailor, reversing and hooking / unhooking the trailor.....

the exam...... first thing I was asked was to unhook the trailor.....
There was an easy 5 step move I'd practiced over and over..... so I get to step three and drive off.....
the emergancy cable and electric cable still attached.... snapped the cable.... couldnt continue with the exam as couldn't drive without the cable....

as a well known mod would say.....

Epic Fail

I was embarressed to f***:o

Jukebox Jury
 
I was sent on a towing a trailor course at work two weeks ago......
spent two days driving around with the trailor, reversing and hooking / unhooking the trailor.....

the exam...... first thing I was asked was to unhook the trailor.....
There was an easy 5 step move I'd practiced over and over..... so I get to step three and drive off.....
the emergancy cable and electric cable still attached.... snapped the cable.... couldnt continue with the exam as couldn't drive without the cable....

as a well known mod would say.....

Epic Fail



I was embarressed to f***:o

Jukebox Jury

If it makes you feel any better my bloody hairdryer just blew up...I'm not kidding...sparks and EVERYTHING! :eek:

I'll have to go out now (with wet hair) to get a new one!

Bloody machines! :rolleyes:

Love Alma xxx
 
Alma,that picture is of a transvestite.

I know this because an old school friend (or should I say fiend Ha!) pretended it was him in a email.(because he is a tranny:squiffy:) and got it from some trannysville site.:D just didn't want anyone feeling inadequate in the breast department looking at those!!:eek:
 
im always running out of petrol!! over the years ive ran out....half way up a multistorey car park, approaching a very busy roundabout and once i had the rac out to the car cause i was sure there was something wrong with car only to find....NO PETROL!!! Drove wrong way down one way street today, at lovely gentleman pointed out this fact to me by a number of hand gestures! thanks tosser!! xx
 
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