Ladies, I need advice on how to be a lady

[Vesper Nocturne]

I don’t think you’re trying to help. If not, please don’t reply.

Oh!! Oh oh oh oh OH!! I see. You don’t think I was trying to help.

Would Your Highnesty have preferred it if I had taken the time to type out “You don’t need that bottle of honkytonk red. If you buy a nice bottle of silver polish, not only will it be easier for you to practice with, but the color will be WAY more forgiving of mistakes, and will also be a lot (INFINITELY!) easier to remove - PLUS short silver nails will ALWAYS work better for a man OR a woman - particularly if someone has indelicate hands. Your Highnesty. *cough*

But as you didn’t think I was trying to be helpful, OH WELL

 

[Deleted member 1074]

It’s like a coloring book - stay in the lines of your nail. Wipe the brush on the bottle and start with only a little polish loaded. You can always add more coats. If you go outside the lines, have a qtip handy and dip it in your nail polish remover so it’s lightly moist. Carefully rub the color off your skin. Get new qtips as you need them. Do clean up after it sets.

I thought I only had a little polish but you see how it turned out!

 

[Anonymous Lady]

Why are you making fun of me?

Oh, I'm not ... just lovingly teasing mixed in with what I thought was some sound and practical advice.

 

[Deleted member 1074]

Oh!! Oh oh oh oh OH!! I see. You don’t think I was trying to help.

Would Your Highnesty have preferred it if I had taken the time to type out “You don’t need that bottle of honkytonk red. If you buy a nice bottle of silver polish, not only will it be easier for you to practice with, but the color will be WAY more forgiving of mistakes, and will also be a lot (INFINITELY!) easier to remove - PLUS short silver nails will ALWAYS work better for a man OR a woman - particularly if someone has indelicate hands. Your Highnesty. *cough*

But as you didn’t think I was trying to be helpful, OH WELL

I think you know very well that you meant this:

 

[Deleted member 1074]

#wrekt

You try it out and see how it turns out on your first attempt.

 

[nicky wire's legs]

Yes...the issue was it didn’t seem to run on smooth like I thought it would. There was resistance and it started to dry and clump. Maybe it was my fault for not using a base coat like TAT mentioned.

is it old? maybe try a new fresh bottle. I don't think nail polish should be doing that. I don't have that much experience though, I haven't worn nail polish since I was a teenager* ** , but I never remembered it being particularly difficult to apply. nail polish can get old you know!

*like countthree I don't believe that it has much to do with feeling like a woman. but I think we dames all like to feel girly in our own way. whining and giggling makes me feel girly, but for other people maybe wearing make up and nail polish makes them feel girly.
**except the times when my sister used to put it on me because she used to manage a (high end, not tacky) spa and used to always use me her as her test subject

 

[Deleted member 1074]

Also, you may want bold, bright colors. But consider starting with something more nude or light pink or light grey which will be more forgiving while you’re learning.

I can work with a light pink!

 

[Deleted member 1074]

^^She knows so much about these things!

One thing to add:
If you have access to a hair dryer, that'll make it dry far faster and also make it less likely to chip.

I have like 3 hair dryers. Lol.

 

[Deleted member 1074]

Other general “Lady” advice:
Oh, and keep your legs together or crossed at the ankles when in dresses and skirts unless you’re with your special someone and it’s “that time.” No one else wants to see your cootchie!

I’ve always crossed my legs like a lady so no issue.

 

[nicky wire's legs]

I don’t know! I don’t know anything about designers!

Please do post samples. I’d like to know as well.

love to! this might take some time though...

 

[Deleted member 1074]

Go have it done and have them teach you. Or just watch. Practice makes perfect. I only pay when I’m at a spa. Otherwise I do my own mani/pedi’s as I’m too cheap. I have an enormous stash of polishes in nearly every color. Too bad you’re not closer or I would give you a lesson.

I would appreciate that. I hope I don’t mess up as badly on my hair as I did my nails. I’m going to dye it soon!

 

[Deleted member 1074]

Last thought for awhile.... nail polish remover contains acetone which is a carcinogen. I tried for awhile to use the non-acetone formulas. But honestly, they work for shit, especially on dark or bold colors. Skip those but only use the acetone stuff as much as you need to do the job. Don’t soak your nails in it like you’ll see some people do.

Thank you for all the advice! You’re a godsend.

 

[Deleted member 1074]

I don't think being a lady has anything to do with a manicure. Sorry, but it is not that easy.

I don’t think it inherently does either, but it is a very common practice and one I’d like to know how to do. If I’m going to do this, I want to be as proficient as I’m capable of being with all aspects of it.

 

[Deleted member 1074]

love to! this might take some time though...

I can hardly wait!

 

[nicky wire's legs]

looking for pics i found a pic of kate middleton wearing a coaat i have:



I never wear it though because it's really quite yellow, more so than it looks in this picture, and yellow looks terrible on me. it's a divine coat though, and a perfect exhibit of why marni has the best prints.

​

 

[Anonymous]

 

[Try Anything Twice]

I didn’t buy any yet. These are @nothappynotsad ’s old stuff. Like, there are a bunch of different ones. OPI, Revlon, I think Essie...is that a thing? I have no idea whether they are quality or not. Don’t really want to spend money until I know what I’m doing.



Yeah, I didn’t do that. I don’t think she even has one.



Ok. Thank you. That makes more sense.



Ok, I’ll have to buy some of that. Thank you!



Ok. Are you supposed to do this at night or something? She always applied hers at night.



Thank you so much!



I know.

My guess is just that they are too old then. Not even a skilled manicurist can make nice nails from goopy polish. You’re going to have to buy new. Just get 1-2 colors you like while you are buying your base and top coat. You can get decent drugstore colors for $5-7 per bottle. Make sure once you start using it, seal the bottles tight once done. It’s air that makes them goopy, well, and quality. Mine are all 5-10 years old and all still fine. If you get polish on bottle thread, be sure to wipe it clean with remover so you don’t need pliers to reopen the bottle next time.

People polish at night cause you tend to be least active. I plan to do nothing much with my hands (or feet) for a couple hours after I finish. Curing is what makes a nice looking, long lasting polish job. I do mine once per week.

 

[Deleted member 1074]

looking for pics i found a pic of kate middleton wearing a coaat i have:


I never wear it though because it's really quite yellow, more so than it looks in this picture, and yellow looks terrible on me. it's a divine coat though, and a perfect exhibit of why marni has the best prints.​

 

[Try Anything Twice]

You’ll get it. It just takes practice. Soon you’ll be doing French manicures blindfolded!

 

[Try Anything Twice]

I don’t think you’re trying to help. If not, please don’t reply.

I use silver polish all the time. I thought she was serious. Silver in front of this line.