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When I was younger I could cope with the sickness I felt about having to go to work. I could cope with stress. I'd be brushing my teeth in the morning before going to work and spewing up with anxiety. It was nothing then. I'm in my 50s now. I don't want that amount of stress. I've had 34vyears of it. I don't like the way I'm treated as an employee. I'm sick of it. But then I have to carry on because I need to earn my pension. That will hardly see me through. So where was the point.? I was born to poverty and I'll die the same way. Where was the point?
It might help if you can find a mental health oriented advocate like we have here at The Kettle Society, to discuss your options if you go on disability.
 
I'm sorry for going on about fat people. There's no hatred there. You surely know me by now. I have many many faults. My excess is drink. Other people's excess is food. I don't hate anyone. I know exactly what I am. And yes, I do see the irony. I do see the hypocrisy in the things I say. I'm sorry.
Don’t worry Dale. Fat Shaming is a positive thing. Sadness led me to laying in bed and eating quavers, I heard my mother telling me I’m getting fat, it worked. I’m running around now like crazy, wouldn’t be surprised in a couple of month if I don’t pass for an anorexic, well, not quite.
 
When I was younger I could cope with the sickness I felt about having to go to work. I could cope with stress. I'd be brushing my teeth in the morning before going to work and spewing up with anxiety. It was nothing then. I'm in my 50s now. I don't want that amount of stress. I've had 34vyears of it. I don't like the way I'm treated as an employee. I'm sick of it. But then I have to carry on because I need to earn my pension. That will hardly see me through. So where was the point.? I was born to poverty and I'll die the same way. Where was the point?
I recall when young, someone berated me at a job for not joining the private pension scheme. I told them I was living now and couldn’t spare money on something I may never live to see. Benefits will help you Dale, a pension only takes out what benefits they will give you. Look into it. I’ve seen rich people die in poverty. We all go out losers. Take care Dale.
 
I got a job offer in Greece today. Yoga teacher in Mykonos from June to October. :lbf:
when did you apply?!

im guessing you're NOT going to accept then? :lbf:
 
I had to throw away most of my photos because they got mold ridden. I'll just post a few more that are on an old Facebook account.
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And from the excitement in my infantile eyes, to just a moment ago, sad looking, medicated eyes. But this medication, Abilify, doesn't stop me from enjoying living. Other antipsychotics did. I'm just wanting to go home from this loony bin and paint.
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It's not medication that's made me 'better'. It's socializing here in the psych ward that I've been prompted to do, that has recivilized me. I'd grown wild is all, from isolation.

I have to say though, slaughterhouses are okay, but me walking nude is not? Everyone says I could get hurt going out in the nude, and that it's for my own safety I was hauled in here and locked in. But everyone here is a hardcore drug addict. I've been making friends here. I'm not going to start doing hard drugs, but, I'm not familiar with this walk of life. People into heroin and proud of it. We'll see what happens when we all get together on the outside.
 
It's not medication that's made me 'better'. It's socializing here in the psych ward that I've been prompted to do, that has recivilized me. I'd grown wild is all, from isolation.

I have to say though, slaughterhouses are okay, but me walking nude is not? Everyone says I could get hurt going out in the nude, and that it's for my own safety I was hauled in here and locked in. But everyone here is a hardcore drug addict. I've been making friends here. I'm not going to start doing hard drugs, but, I'm not familiar with this walk of life. People into heroin and proud of it. We'll see what happens when we all get together on the outside.

It's good you're getting better.
 
I got a bit fed up with Stream today. He's constantly criticising David for talking about Boris Johnson and he ran off when Dave came over and talked about him. He's hard work though, Stream is. He's constantly making jokes and you're having to make a point of laughing but it can become titesome after a while. He turns everything you say into a pun. You have to be happy and jolly all the time. I entertain it to a degree and he probably feels I'm easy company but I feel he's underestimating me. He feels I'm someone he can talk AT rather than talk WITH. I'm going to have to disappoint him at some juncture and let him know that I'm bored of his wise cracks and just because he knows I'm ill it doesn't give him licence to bore me stupid every time I see him. He ran rough shod over me today. But it was all done with a jest and a joke, but it's drained me. .I'd much rather be talking about mundane things with Dave. He doesn't insist on happiness. He's OK with me being dour and miserable. Stream is taking advantage of my easy going nature. He's found faith he was drinking like me a few months back. I never knew him them, but Colin helped him through and now he's stopped drinking and he's exuberant. He just chosen the wrong person to be exuberant with. He's found a new lease of life and he thinks I'm part of his new life and in a way he feels I'm part of the scenery. He's being naive. I'm the stage he performs on. I don't have any lines. I'm the setting. I speak when he gives me the cue. He was downright rude with Dave when he came along.
Yikes. Whatcha gonna do to Stream?
 
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