For anyone wondering, here's the inside story of how this smashing chart triumph went down.
(Sam answers phone half awake)
Sam: Hello?
(Morrissey whispering)
Morrissey: It's me, uncle.
Sam: Hi, uncle. Are you okay?
Morrissey: On deaths door, as usual. Look, I need a favor from you.
Sam: Anything, uncle.
Morrissey: "My Love" is due out tomorrow. It's the best thing I've ever done, but we both know the game is rigged. Listen, tomorrow I need you to rise at the crack of dawn, and scour every known music shop in the country that sells vinyl, and buy every single one. All of them. We mustn't leave this in the hands of the fickle public. You know it's great, and I know it's great, but my coterie of loyalists would rather I sing it to them in person than listen to it on their vastly inferior musical devices. Understandable, yes, but there needs to be some balance.
Sam: Tomorrow?
Morrissey: Yes. Tomorrow, and every day for the next week; or until all supply is exhausted.
Sam: Okay.
Morrissey: Ooh, my dear boy. Also, one more thing...
Sam: Anything, uncle.
Morrissey: I need you to get dressed right now, and kill Ed Sheehan.
Sam: But Uncle, it's three o'clock in the in the morning.
Morrissey: Just kidding. Get some rest. Oh, and I want those receipts.